Inspiration

I wanted to write that in French but it's the same. It is in French and English. It is a bilingual word.

Today I feel oddly/odly (however it is that you spell that word) inspired to be me. To be the young, and wild, and free 22 year old girl that I am. I feel happy and content and largely in love with my husband, extra thankful for my friends and extra extra happy that I live in Winnipeg with everyone else who lives in Winnipeg.

Today I had lunch with my very dear friend. Tomorrow she is going to venture into untracked land (un-tracked by her) and accompany her beau to his highschool reunion. While drinking coffee at a small table for two, she confessed to feeling silly about her fresh age of 21 amidst a class of adults - 10 years post-highschool. I looked her right in the eye and said "homegirl - never be ashamed of your age." Then I repeated a line which an equally dear friend once uttered, unknown to what significance it would have to me, "Confidence is key." That is what I believe. Admittedly, there have been times when I have felt disadvantaged by my young age as I, like her, typically can be found among people that don't share this age as common ground. In the past few months I have taken very strongly to my age and dread the days of an older one. Again, I have to admit that it's not because of this key confidence that I am so bold to preach about, but more in fear that life won't be what it is now, that it will not bring flowers and kisses and giggles, as it has consistently at age 22. Regardless of the reasons, my age is one thing I hold dear to my heart and I would defend to the end. 22. That is me. That is my age.

Sometimes I confuse who I am with who I want to be. I might say, think, or write something, re-visit it and wonder, with all the honesty within me, if it were merely a wish-filled thought, or the strings of my heart. I would love to crack the code. Aside from this confusion, today I feel content about this struggle. Today I feel like the scrapes I have inside my soul are okay to have; acknowledged and free, they will be sorted in due time. In this moment and in this year, this is who I am pleased to be.

Ummm... Also this weekend will be grand. I feel it and I know it. Me and my team are going to storm the streets, the stores, the wedding and our very own living room with love and fun and I just can't wait.


xoxo forever,
V.