Chapter One

It was Thursday evening, May 14th 1987 at approximately 7:15pm when my parents rudely interrupted my sisters and their Cosby show watching with an announcement. Groans were groaned, but slowly after ten shoes were put on and laced (or maybe velcro'd), the five Hieberts made their way outside. Hopping into the family station wagon bearing one over-sized mother, one anxious father, and three seriously annoyed sisters, they made their way to the hospital where a brief two hours later, there was a new name to be added to the Hiebert family tree... A female name at that, what a surprise! Although, it really was a surprise. You see, R and J didn't know that four years after the last girl they proudly produced yet another would enter their lives. A surprise child was I, although my mom swears it was a pleasant one. So Vanessa Ruth, me, entered the world as seven pounds of humanity with big blue eyes, red skin, and a couple strands of dark hair. The world would never be the same again.



In my first year of life I was the center of attention at 195 Emerson Avenue. My sisters would race home from school every day, the prize for the win was being first to hold their novelty of a sister. I'm sure that wore off quickly. What didn't wear off quickly however, was an already blooming friendship before the age of one. My cousin, Alexandra, being born a mere 34 days before me was quickly nominated as my official life-long play date. Hooray!

Aside from learning how to be alive, I don't think that very much excitement, scandal, or drama took place in this first year of my life. Although, what could be more exciting or scandalous than sucking on a tit seven times a day? Yeah, that's what I thought...